LSS: Can't Fight This Feeling

I can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show

And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winters night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore

My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you
I've been running round in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I'm following you, girl
'Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find

And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winters night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars forever

'Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
Even if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crushing through your door
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore

Peace Offering

Last week, me and Jaydee had a really rough week.  We did not fight but it was really the roughest week that we had in our four-year old relationship.  It is because I've done something that had really hurt him.  I did it not because to hurt him or to make avenge of all the times that he made me cry.  I just done it.  I can't stop my feelings you know.  Because of what I've done, he suddenly realize of how much pain he has caused me for the past months.  He suddenly felt what I have felt for those months that he did not seem to care of what I am feeling.  


Before we had our dreaded talk, he asked me first if I wanted to buy a stuffed toy.  I told him no because I know his view of me buying toys for myself.  So he dragged me to Metro Ayala Department store and made me choose on what teddy bear I want to buy.  While looking at those teddy bears, an idea came to me.  Instead of buying a teddy bear, I should just buy a doll house. (hehehehe...)  I was really so excited while choosing the doll house.  I was really like a small kid at that time with his father on his side. (hahaha...)  I guess we really needed that time before having our serious talk.  Because of that, everything was cleared and we are happy again.

One Wish Was Made Come True...

On my post "What I Want this Christmas" I mentioned ten things that I wanted to receive this Christmas.  One of the wish is that someone will give me a "Turtle/Tortoise Stuff Animal":.  I have so many stuff animals, some of those I bought personally and some are gifts from my friends and loved ones.  But I never really had a "Turtle/Tortoise Stuff Animal", well not until this month when I saw an array of turtle stuffed toy being displayed in 168 Mall in Colon.  Impulsively, I bought it.  Hahahaha...  But before that, I already posted on our bulletin on our office for my manito to buy it.  And guess what he really did give it to me.  Hehehehe.  And it is not just a mere small turtle stuffed toy, it is a humongous one.  Hehehehe...  I was one of the Mater's of Ceremony on our Christmas Party that night so when the manito/manita begun, I was infront of the stage telling the people whose table should be the first one to give their gifts and then Wally walk towards the stage carrying this huge box and Raymond was behind him carrying a camera to take a picture of me accepting the gift.  I did not open the gift immediately even though Corie was cheering for me to open it because I was still busy with my role as the emcee.  So when I went back to my table after the program was finished, again Corie,Jason and Raymond cheered for me to open the gift.  While I was unwrapping the gift, many people circled around us cheering.  Hahahaha...  I was really having a hard time unwrapping the gift because I was just using one hand, because I used the other one to hold my dress.  Hehehehe...  Thankfully my manito Wally was there to help me.  And so when he finally was able to open the gift, and the humongous turtle stuffed toy was revealed, I was really really happy that I immediately hug it.  It was so cute and cuddly.  Weeeeehhhh...   Words aren't really enough to describe how happy I was that evening.(yeah...mabaw kog kalipay...hahahaha...)  Thank you very much to Wally.  I now have another stuffed animal to hug every night.  Hehehehe.

Heartaches of a girl

I guess I was wrong.  But I hope and I pray that I'm not.  I will hold on till the end that I am not.  I still want to believe that everything that I believe is right.  I don't care what other people will say, as long as I know the truth.  As long that I know that I'm not doing bad, that can hurt anyone else.  I will still believe in you 'coz you are my friend.  I trust you that you won't hurt me 'coz I still consider you as my friend.  I hope everything will be back from the way it was before.

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I want to cry till the pain will go away.  I want to shout till my lungs will run dry, if this is the only way that I won't feel the pain in my heart again.

Can't We Just be Friends?

When I was in college I joined an organization in our school called Campus Ministry.  The people in that organization became my second family, my confidant in the school and the office were we usually hang-out became my second home.  I treated them just like a real brothers and sisters.  Little did I know that some of those people that I have considered as my "Kuya" are taking my actions differently.  It came to a point that one of my "Kuya" took a bold step to court me.  He sent me gifts and leeters anonymously.  Even my other ate's and kuya's who knew who sent me those stuffs won't even tell me.  So I did not able to stop what he was doing right from the very beginning.  But at the time that he already revealed himself I immediately told him that I only consider him as my Kuya and that nothing can ever change that.  I told him that I appreciate what he has done and am thankful for what he felt for me.  I thought that after our talk he will then stop.  But he did not.  He still sent me gifts and his treatment for me is still special.  So again, I confronted him about it.  And now, his not talking to me anymore. =(  


Unfortunately, another kuya of mine is trying to make a move with me.  Well, this wasn't the first time that he told me that he like me.  He already told me about his feelings for me before we graduated in college.  Thankfully, he did not court me that time because he knew what happened to the last time that a certain kuya has courted me.  He also doesn't want to ruin our friendship.  But recently after we had dinner together with the CCYM family, he then told me about his feelings.  Every now and then, he would tell me that he misses me and he loves me.  I don't want our friendship to be ruined.  I want to confront him but I'm afraid that if I do that, he would also hate me like what happened to my other kuya.  


Because of those incidents, a question popped into my mind.  Can't a man and a women just be friends?  Isn't it possible that both of them will never fall inlove with each other?  Isn't it possible that other people will not put some malice when they see 2 people in opposite sex so close?  Can't they really be just friends?

Am I Not Pretty Enough

Am I not pretty enough?
Is my heart too broken?
Do I cry too much?
Am I too outspoken?
Don’t I make you laugh?
Should I try it harder?
Why do you see right through me?


I live, I breathe, I let it rain on me,
I sleep, I wake, I try hard not to break,
I crave, I love, I’ve waited long enough,
I try as hard as I can.


Am I not pretty enough?
Is my heart too broken?
Do I cry too much?
Am I too outspoken?
Don’t I make you laugh?
Should I try it harder?
Why do you see right through me?


I laugh, I feel, I make believe it’s real,
I fall, I freeze, I pray down on my knees,
I hope, I stand, I take it like a man,
I try as hard as I can.


Am I not pretty enough?
Is my heart too broken?
Do I cry too much?
Am I too outspoken?
Don’t I make you laugh?
Should I try it harder?
Why do you see right through me?


Why do you see, why do you see, why do you see right through me?x3

Mishuu na...

Text conversation between me and my friend which we nicknamed shield...

Me : Bry...Hehehe! Good Evening... Wala lang samok2x lang ko...hehehe...

Bryan : Bleeh! Hahaha! Adik ai...

Me : Hehehe...Wala man gud koy lingaw gud maong nag samok2x ko nimo... Others nakay ka ha... hehehe... Mishuu Bry... Hahaha...

Bryan : Hala ngano gud others ko? When did that happen man daw? Gimingaw sad gani ko ninyo ug sa atong mga kaboang...hahaha...

Me : Hehehe! Wala lang others lang ka kay dili naman ka managad.

Bryan : Kay nagkita diay ta? Nakit.an ko nimo?

Me : Wala... Hahaha!!! Others lang ka... Hahaha...

Bryan : Hahaha Bleh Nyt diay daan mwuah...

Me : Nyt2x...Mwaaahugz...

That was the recent conversation that I had with one of my close friend Bryan.  The last time I saw him was when he went here in our office to borrow my Windows Vista OS installer.  But it was just a brief encounter.  He took the installer from me, chat for about 10minutes then went back to our jobs.  After that encounter, we did not see each other again, nor chatted in YM,FB nor texted each other.  It was just recently that I remembered that I have a friend named Bryan whom I really missed a lot.  Hahaha! Shame on me.  Hehehe!


Me and Bryan were friends since I was still a 3rd year college student.  We became friends because I was the president on our organization at that time and he was also one of the officers.  We became really close back then because of the so many problems that I have encountered at that time(those were really simple problems...but i always chicken out in confronting people... :( ) and it was Bryan who helped me alot.(while I was crying inside the chapel/CR, he was at the faculty office confronting our adviser and explaining things...hahaha...stupid me...hahaha...)  Bryan became my shield at that time, from the people around me and even from the heat of the sun.(he was so tall so we always hide from his back to hide from the heat of the sun...hehehe...)  He always complain about that and those times that I cry and run out of my problems, but nevertheless, he is still there for me and for retchel.  He is also one of the few people in our group of friends who can enter in Retchel and my world.  Well, me and Retchel are sort of geeks and kinda so full of imaginations, we kinda have our own world. hahaha.  And Bryan has the privileged to enter and understand it.  hehehe.


This Monday(November 22, 2010), me, Retchel and Bryan agreed that we will meet in Abellana Sports Complex to jog and bond at the same time. (Most of the time it will be me and Retchel who will jog side by side while Bryan will leave us to practice. He is a runner.)  I'm really so excited to see two of my closest friends.  I really hope it won't rain.  :)

Afraid for love to fade By Lea Salonga

My head's in a jam
Can't take you off my mind
From the time we met
I've been beset by thoughts of you
And the more that I ignore this feeling
The more I find myself believing
That I just have to see you again

I can't let you pass me by
I just can't let you go
But I know that I am much too shy
To let you know
Afraid that I might say the wrong words
And displease you
Afraid for love to fade
Before it can come true

Like a child again
I'm at a loss for words
How does one define
A crush combined with longing?
Longing to possess you oh so dearly
I'm obsessed by you completely
I'll go mad if I can't have you

I can't let you pass me by
I just can't let you go
But I know that I am much too shy
To let you know
Afraid that I might say the wrong words
And displease you
Afraid for love to fade
Before it can come true

(Instrumental)

Oooooooooohhhhhhh

I can't let you pass me by
I just can't let you go
But I know that I am much too shy
To let you know
Afraid that I might say the wrong words
And displease you
Afraid for love to fade
Before it can come true

I can't let you pass me by
I just can't let you go
Let me say the things and say the words
To let you know
I would rather say the awkward words
Than lose you
Or for love to fade
Before it can come true

Rantings...

I've been trying to be part in a world where I don't belong.  Hoping that someday people will accept me, will welcome me.  I'm alone, lonely and lost.  No one to talk to.  No one to run to.  Should I continue to be here Or should I give-up in trying?  But I don't know where to go.  If I give-up now, I know that wherever I go things will just be the same.  So I'll just be the invisible girl for now.

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Support?  You want me to support you?  I can't do that.  I can't even manage my own life.  I easily give-up when something bad comes in the way.  I still have lots of things to worry about.  And the last thing I want to do is to worry other people's life.  You don't need me.  I can't help you.  You alone can help yourself.

What I Want this Christmas

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth.  Hahahaha! Joke!  As we all know Christmas is fast approaching.  It's the time of the year where people from all shapes and sizes rush on the malls to buy stuffs to give to their friends and families.  Well it's also the time of the year wherein we also list the things that we want to receive on Christmas day.


When I was still a little kid, during this time, my mother would tell us to write a letter for Jesus on what we would like to receive on Christmas day.  After we finished writing the letter, we then put it on our altar.  Then, starting that day we will pray the rosary in front of our altar so that our wish/prayers will come true.  But sad to say, I really did not received all the toys that I have wished and wrote on that letter.  Hehehe!  Nevertheless, I learned how to pray the rosary and be grateful of every blessings that the Lord God has bestowed on me and to my family.


Despite the fact that every year I don't get my wishes.  I still continue to write a letter to Jesus or write the things that I wanted to receive on Christmas.  So just like before below are a few things that I want to receive on Christmas.

1.) Turtle/Tortoise Stuff Toy
2.) Maxie Girl/Bratz Doll
3.) Doll House
4.) Troll Doll
5.) New Shoes
6.) New Dress
7.) Polly Pocket
8.) Magic 8 Ball
9.) Baby Alive Doll
10.) Complete Drawing Set

10 Things I Hate About You

Don't get me wrong, I do love my sister.  But there are just a few things that makes me hate her.

1.) I hate you when you tell ridiculous things about me infront of your friends/family to make me embarrased.


2.) I hate you when you criticized the boys that I like.  You always find faults on them.


3.) I hate your being so greedy.  You always want everything to be yours.


4.) I hate your being so selfish.  You always think of yourself first.  You don't think if someone else will be hurt or has been hurt because of what you have done.


5.) I hate you for being so bossy.  


6.) I hate you for always comparing yourself to me.


7.) I hate you for always criticizing me.  It seems that you really want to put me down.


8.) I hate your being so loud.


9.) I hate you for always asking me to make chip-in in what you will buy.


10.) I hate your being so materialistic.

One Sunday Afternoon

Yesterday, November 08, 2010, Sunday, me and bhe2x Jaydee agreed to watch the movie of Kim Chui and Gerald Anderson's Till My Heartaches End.  You might ask, why we chose to watch that movie yesterday of all the nice movies that was showed on the movie house.  Well, the answer is because bhe2x wanted me to learn something from that movie.  And that is also the reason why I'm writing this entry.  He wanted me to write what I've learned from that movie and what I felt while watching the film.  Hehehe!

I can't really deny the fact that there were really a bunch of episodes and lines from the movie wherein I can really relate.  Just like the episode wherein Bangs Garcia her boyfriend were talking.  Her boyfriend told her that everytime they have a fight, Bangs would immediately post it facebook.  Letting the world know what she was feeling and what her boyfriend did.  Hehehe.  I'm guilty with this.  I won't deny that.  Hahaha!  I can't help it sometimes.  I need an outlet sometimes wherein I can release my anger and frustrations.  I don't really have a lot of friends where I can run to and tell them all the things I want to say.  And sometimes, if I tell it to Jaydee personally, he doesn't seem to understand what I feel or he doesn't want to hear it out.  That's why I just post it in facebook where he has no choice but to read it.  Hahaha!  That's also my way of making him sorry for what he did.  Hahaha.  Mean me. Hahaha!

Another part of the movie wherein I was guilty of doing is when Gerald was becoming so busy with his work wherein to the point that he can't text or call Kim anymore.  And Kim on the otherhand will bombard Gerald's phone with text messages asking him of his whereabouts or call him every 30 minutes.  I know that ones a person gets very busy, they sometimes tend to forget little things like texting or calling those people who would really be getting worried.  If I was in Gerald's place, I would really be annoyed if somebody will send me a gazillion text messages demanding for my whereabout or of what I am doing.  But hey, wouldn't you also be annoyed if you were in Kim's shoes?  You will wait for how many hours, will be so worried as to why on earth not a single text message was sent to you telling you that he is/will be very busy with work.  Hello! Does texting "I'm busy right now." to a person will take you forever?

I'm not perfect and I know so is Jaydee.  I know I tend to overreact on some situations sometimes.  But this is me.  I'm really a drama queen.  I also know that even if Jaydee and I are commited with each other, it doesn't mean that it should only be the two of us.  That we will stop seeing our friends and just spend our time with each other.  I completely understand that.  But you can't blame me if sometimes I tend to be so selfish of his time.  If I only want that his spare time should only be spend with me.  As I have said, I only got a few friends and I'm also not that close with my family.  That's the reason why I always seek for Jaydee's attention.  But I'm really trying hard not to build my entire life with him.  I'm now trying to spend some time with my friends and meet new friends.

Honestly, while watching the movie, I was really angry and annoyed because every episode that Jaydee knows that I am guilty of doing, he then tease me and say "Awa! Awa! Mura jug bhe2x... Bhe2x jud kaau."  It seems that we where watching the movie to point out all the bad things I have done.  I know sometimes I'm being unreasonable and stubborn but is it really all my fault?  Is that what this is all about?

The Joys of Having a Guy Friend

I only have a few very close friends to mention.  They are in different genders, I have a few female friends, male friends and even gay friends. hehehe.  But majority of my close friends are guys.  I don't know but I can easily get along with my boyfriends rather than with my girlfriends.  No, I'm not tibo.  Infact, I'm a very kikay girl. hahahaha! Yes, I am.  Believe it or not but I'm one of those girls who will go gaga with pink stuffs. hahaha.  But i also love to play tekken, God of War, and DOTA, which most of the guys are playing.  


As I was saying awhile ago, majority of my close friends consists of guys.  I will enumerate a few of the good things in having a guy friend.


1.) If the sun is up, and you forgot your umbrella, they won't mind that you will use them as your shield against the heat of the sun. (hahaha...mean...)


2.) They'll buy you food when you tell them that you are very hungry. (nyum...nyum...nyum...hehehe...)


3.) Even if it will be so late, they woul still accompany you in going home to make sure that you are okay.


4.) They will listen to you when you cry out loud, whine or nag about your problems may it be lovelife or work related, anything. They will tell you "Okay rana...Smile na..." until you calm down.  Then they will give you chocolates to really cheer you up. (what's with chocolate? why not pizza? hahahaha... nag demand ang loka... hahahaha...)


5.) You can poke, punch, or even bite them all you want and they will not keep a grudge on you.  Even if they'll poke, punch or bite you back, they won't make it so painful. (hehehe...)


6.) You can talk to them about video games, horror movies, cars, and anime.


7.) You get free hugs even when you really don’t need it.


8.) You can talk to them till four in the morning without them worrying about their beauty sleep. (literally 4am in the morning.  you were still talking with him at that time, you were still up when suddenly a member of your family will wake up to get ready for work or school while you, will still then go to sleep. hehehehe...)


9.) They offer to fetch you from your house.  Sometimes, they will just show up on your house in the morning while you were still getting ready for school or work. (hahaha... they won't even mind waiting for you to finish your rituals...hahahah...)


10.) They don’t mind walking with you around the mall, colon or even carbon market.


11.) If they will tease you to the next level wherein you'll be sulking on it because you felt bad on what he did, then you'll be the drama queen because you will then not talk to him, they will surely do anything for you to talk to them again, for you to forgive them.  (They will then give you a Mocha Frappe from Bo's or Starbucks if you will forgive them. hahahaha...)


12.) They give you cool mp3s, movies, PSP games. They woul even go to far by finding so many ways if a game that you really wanted will not play on your PSP.


13.) They will tell you honestly what they think of what you are wearing or what clothes you are going to buy.  If the style is not so into you, they would surely tell you the truth.


14.) They make you laugh,smile especially if you are so down. They even find ways to make you laugh even in the strangest, weirdest ways


15.) They listen when you sing and won't leave you alone if you'll make funny moves in the middle of SM or Ayala. (hahahaha...)


16.) They watch your back. They will be your knight in a shining armour when you need one.


17.) They will give-in to your dares and treat you in IMAX when they lose.


18.) They will treat you to the different restos that you've never been to.


19.) They will bring foods for you, especially foods that you haven't tasted before.


20.) They won’t try to change you.


21.) They tell you you’re beautiful. (hahahaha... every girl needs to be told that they are beautiful.. so? hahahahaha...)


22.) They inspire you.


23.) They look after you when you are sick.


24.) They'll gladly finish your food for you.


25.) You can be so cheesy or charing all you want.


26.) You'll be confortable in acting or saying the things you want to do or say infront of them without being afraid of losing them, because they accept you for who you are. :)


Well, that's all I can think of for now.  All I can say is despite the fact that sometimes they make me wanna cry out of annoyance, or they make me want to blow up like a volcano, I love my guy friends.  Don't want to loose them.  I will endure anything just to stay friends with them. (yeah...yeah...ka charingan again...hahahahha...)  But seriously, I will always be on their back to support them. :)

Uncertainties in Life

I've been living in this world for over twenty-three years but I can't still say that I already know myself as much as the people with same age around me can tell themselves.  I still have this doubt whether I am chasing the right dream and living the life that I really want.  I am still questioning myself everyday whether I am meant to walk on the path that I am walking right now or should I follow the other path.  But everytime the thought of going into the other path comes into my mind, I shiver, I get more confused and afraid.  Afraid that when I go there, I might regret it in the end.


I am a coward.  I know.  But I know I'm not alone.  But I also know that it is not an excuse for me to continue being a coward.  Sooner or later, I should step up and make a very important decision as to what I really want to do with my life.  With God's guidance, I will surely be able to choose the right path.  I believe that whatever I am going to choose, even if I weill encounter some problems or difficulties along the way, I'm sure that everything has its own reasons and that it will just past. That the blessings or the dream come true that I have longed been waiting for will finally knock on my door or even on the window. hehehehehe! 

Your EQ is 80

You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. You're quite moody, and sometimes you find yourself feeling upset without knowing what really caused it. Your emotions can overtake you at times, and you do tend to become preoccupied with your negative thoughts. Remember that your emotions don't have to rule your life, and take it easy when you deal with other people. The world is a difficult enough place - no need to make life any harder for yourself! Hahaha...The above result is so freaking true... Gosh... Hahahaha!!!

25 Random Questions

1. What was the last book you read?
• The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks
2. Do you like to cook?
• Yup...Super like...
3. What's your favorite food?
• Past and lechon manok
4. Which sport do you like?
• I'm not really a sporty gal, but among the many sports present today i would prefer swimming or badminton.
5. Have you ever met a famous person?
• I can;t recall...Maybe...
6. How do you spend your free time?
• Read a book, surfing, sketching
7. What are your hobbies?
• Reading, Sketching, Texting
8. What do you do on Sundays?
• Spend time with my bhe2x and hear a mass 
9. What is your motto in life?
• It is better to deserve honor and not have it than having it and not deserving it.
10. What are you best at?
• I don't know... 
11. Who do you respect the most?
• My parents...
12. Would you like to be famous?
• Maybe?
13. What do you think you will be doing five years from now?
• still coding...
14. When do you feel best? In the morning, afternoon, or evening?
• Evening...?
15. What kind of man would you like to marry?
• Understanding, kind, God-fearing and responsible
16. What cartoon character best describes you?
• Minnie Mouse...
17. If you could live anywhere in the world for a year, where would it be?
• Paris
18. If you knew you could try anything and not fail, what dream would you attempt? Why?
• To become a Pastry Chef...I just want it...
19. What super-power would you most like to have, and why?
• To be able to become invisible...
20. Would you live with someone without marrying them?
• Nope...
21. Would you rather take pictures or be in pictures?
• Take pictures...
22. Are you a beach, country or city person?
• Country...
23. Where do you spend most of your money?
• Books, food, house
24. Do you like pets? Have you any?
• Yup...I have a pet dog and a pet turtles..
25. Do you love kids?
• Yup...

Ball Jointed Doll:I So Want One

Last night, I was scanning on the latest blog post of those bloggers that I follow.  One of those blogger is Alodia.   She posted her latest acquisition of a BJD doll.  They were really so cute and beautiful.  I really want to have one of those.  But the sad thing is, aside from the fact that they are expensive, they can only be bought in Hong Kong, Japan and Korea.  Sigh! Oh well, I'll just look at them and admire them in pictures instead.  heheheheh!

Below are some of the pictures that I have googled.

Comfort Zone vs. Courage Zone

Don't be afraid, I am filling your heart with courage. I will be with you, I will never forsake you.  --God

Never focus on your problems. Focus on your possibilities.  The problems will pull you down.  The possibilities will push you up.  -- Brother Bo Sanchez

I have read in Brother Bo's blog regarding stepping out of our comfort zone to venture into our courage zone to become successful and happy in our life.  On his write-up he asked the readers to get a piece of paper and a pen to write what they really want for their life or how they define success in their life.  Then they should have the proper mindset on how they will get or achieve the things they want.

When I got a pen and a paper so that I can begin to write the things that I really want in my life, that I would not be afraid to take a risk to do it, I was having a difficult time thinking on what I am going to write.  You might be wondering why on earth I am having trouble figuring out what I want for my life.  It is because the things that I want to achieve in my life are not in correlation with my core zone or core gift.  The things that I want to achieve are those things that I did not bravely do before because I chose to be practical rather than following my dream.  And I was also afraid that if I'm going to follow that path, I would fail.  Well, come to think of it, I am really circling or living on my comfort zone for my 23 years of existence here on earth.  Gosh! What a coward I have become.

I should try to be more of a risk taker rather than living a life full of regrets because I haven't tried to follow my dream.  If I won't try, I won't grow to be a better person and I won't learn so many lessons in life.

Hope I can do this.  May God Bless me and guide me always.

Powers

I often hear it on the radio or read it on forums regarding a poll question asking that if ever they will possess a power, what would it be and why.  If I were to answer the said question, my choice would be the power to become invisible and that what I will touch will become invisible too if I want it too.

It would really be fun and helpful If I can do that.  I can come inside a room without them noticing me and if ever they will gossip about me I will know what they are saying bad towards me. hehehehe!  And if somebody is running after me or if I want to hide from someone, I'll just go invinsible.

But of course like what the famous quote in spiderman says, "With great power, comes with a great responsibility",  I should be very mindful that I won't do anything bad or that I won't take advantage with the power that I will possess.

Kame and Kichi

I have two cute Red Eared Slider turtles which I named Kame and Kichi. I named them as such because when I bought them, I was in the hype of watching the Japanese series of Sailor Moon. And on that TV Series, one of the characters has a pet Red Eared Slider whose name was Kamekichi. I have two Red Eared Sliders so I decided to breakdown the name into two. "Kame" means turte while "Kichi" if I'm not mistaken means lucky or luck/

When I bought them they were just merely 1inch tall. But now, they have already grown big. Kame is already 3 1/4 inches while Kichi is already 4inches. Kichi is much bigger than Kame because Kichi eats a lot than Kame.

I've read that a Red Eared Slider could live up to ten years if they are taken cared very well. I would really love to see the pace of the growth of Kame and Kichi up to ten years. Hopefully, if God forbids, I would really love my future kids to see my pet turtles. so that I can pass to them my being a pet lover and especially my being a nature lover.

Every end of the month I usually measure Kame and Kichi, and here is the pace of their growth.

Kame:
August: 1 1/2 inches
September: 2 inches
October: 2 1/4 inches
November: 2 3/4 inches
December: 3 inches
January: 3 1/4 inches
February: 3 1/4 inches
March - April : 3 1/2 inches

Kichi:
August: 1 3/4 inches
September: 2 inches
October: 2 1/2 inches
November: 3 inches
December: 3 1/4 inches
January: 3 1/2 inches
February: 3 3/4 inches
March - April : 4 inches

Picture! Picture!

How I Became a Programmer

I can still remember those times wherein I was sitting and listening to each representative from the different colleges in USC. While listening to them, I was also envisioning myself being an architect, an engineer, a teacher and other many professions. But after the seminar, I then ask myself if I can really take the challenge of being an architect, engineer or a teacher. I did not have enough confidence or trust on myself that I could do or achieve anything that I want to be.

I did not believe in myself that I can be a teacher. Where I will be teaching cute and innocent little kids. I know I like kids but I don't know if I have the patience to teach them. To really make them understand the things that I will be teaching to them. I might end up shouting or calling them names or whatsoever. So I crossed-out being a teacher on my options.

I also did not believe in myself that I could be an engineer or an architect. I can't imagine living in a world hand-in-hand with numbers, calculating whether the plan for a building or a home is right. I wasn't also confident enough if I can draw a plan for a house or buildings. So I also crossed-out being an engineer or an architect on my options.

Becoming a psychologist was also on my option back then. But I was afraid that I could not give a great advice or can help those who will need my help. So I also crossed it out on my option.

There were so many professions that I have considered but ended up crossing all of them out. Well, not really all because If I did, I ended up a tambay now... (hehehehe!)

I was having fun solving and making computer programs on our programming class back then in high school. So I took an entrance exam in USC for Computer Science course. I already passed the entrance test and was just about to enroll. But then, my mother told me to take an entrance test in USJ-R. While filling-up the form the working student who guided me and helped me with processes and the papers told me to take BSIT instead. So I followed her advice and luckily the decision that I made wasn't wrong. I graduated as a Cum Laude and I immediately got a job. Thanks to ate Naj. (hehehehe!)

The Best Thing that Happened To Us...

I woke up early today so that I can attend on my bhe2x Jaybear's graduation. Even though I was still sleepy because I slept so late the night before, I really forced myself to wake up and get ready. Today is a very special day for my bhe2x. I know, because I've seen how he worked hard to achieve what he has achieved right now. He graduated as a Magna Cum Laude. I feel like crying seeing him wearing his toga and especially when he received his medal and his diploma. At last, all his hard work has payed off. The happiness I have felt is doubled to the happiness that I have felt when I graduated last 2008. The reason is because, our dreams, goals and plans are starting to unfold. We might not be together in the future but at least we have been together on those very special moments.

Wish you all the best bhe2x...Love you...Mwahhh...

Days with Jaybear

We always have a food trip with my bhe2x jaybear... Below are just some pictures of a few of our food trips...

Our favorite fastfood chain where we always have our food trips. We always eat chicken fillet, french fries and a vanilla sundae... Yum...Yum...Yum...

But right now, because I was craving for a spaghetti, I asked my bhe2 to order a spaghettit nalang instead of the usual chicken fillet.heheheh...

While eating, my bhe2 keeps on taking my picture. Taking my picture to have some evidence of my being matakaw. hahahhaha...

Hahahaha! Now I have an evidence that you too eh very matakaw... hahahahaha...

Picture picture after eating...Smile!

The three photos above was taken in chowking. Another fastfood chain that we always go to. This was the day wherein I was so angry with him that is why he took me to chowking. He always know what soothes up my anger. hahahahha...food and his pa cute2x...hahahahaha...

Caught in the act...hehehehe...

Picture picture again after eating...