Yesterday, November 08, 2010, Sunday, me and bhe2x Jaydee agreed to watch the movie of Kim Chui and Gerald Anderson's Till My Heartaches End. You might ask, why we chose to watch that movie yesterday of all the nice movies that was showed on the movie house. Well, the answer is because bhe2x wanted me to learn something from that movie. And that is also the reason why I'm writing this entry. He wanted me to write what I've learned from that movie and what I felt while watching the film. Hehehe!
I can't really deny the fact that there were really a bunch of episodes and lines from the movie wherein I can really relate. Just like the episode wherein Bangs Garcia her boyfriend were talking. Her boyfriend told her that everytime they have a fight, Bangs would immediately post it facebook. Letting the world know what she was feeling and what her boyfriend did. Hehehe. I'm guilty with this. I won't deny that. Hahaha! I can't help it sometimes. I need an outlet sometimes wherein I can release my anger and frustrations. I don't really have a lot of friends where I can run to and tell them all the things I want to say. And sometimes, if I tell it to Jaydee personally, he doesn't seem to understand what I feel or he doesn't want to hear it out. That's why I just post it in facebook where he has no choice but to read it. Hahaha! That's also my way of making him sorry for what he did. Hahaha. Mean me. Hahaha!
Another part of the movie wherein I was guilty of doing is when Gerald was becoming so busy with his work wherein to the point that he can't text or call Kim anymore. And Kim on the otherhand will bombard Gerald's phone with text messages asking him of his whereabouts or call him every 30 minutes. I know that ones a person gets very busy, they sometimes tend to forget little things like texting or calling those people who would really be getting worried. If I was in Gerald's place, I would really be annoyed if somebody will send me a gazillion text messages demanding for my whereabout or of what I am doing. But hey, wouldn't you also be annoyed if you were in Kim's shoes? You will wait for how many hours, will be so worried as to why on earth not a single text message was sent to you telling you that he is/will be very busy with work. Hello! Does texting "I'm busy right now." to a person will take you forever?
I'm not perfect and I know so is Jaydee. I know I tend to overreact on some situations sometimes. But this is me. I'm really a drama queen. I also know that even if Jaydee and I are commited with each other, it doesn't mean that it should only be the two of us. That we will stop seeing our friends and just spend our time with each other. I completely understand that. But you can't blame me if sometimes I tend to be so selfish of his time. If I only want that his spare time should only be spend with me. As I have said, I only got a few friends and I'm also not that close with my family. That's the reason why I always seek for Jaydee's attention. But I'm really trying hard not to build my entire life with him. I'm now trying to spend some time with my friends and meet new friends.
Honestly, while watching the movie, I was really angry and annoyed because every episode that Jaydee knows that I am guilty of doing, he then tease me and say "Awa! Awa! Mura jug bhe2x... Bhe2x jud kaau." It seems that we where watching the movie to point out all the bad things I have done. I know sometimes I'm being unreasonable and stubborn but is it really all my fault? Is that what this is all about?